Back to “The Camino”. Back To Myself.

It seems that starting over is something we can do as often as needed.

As you know, I’ve been going through a tough period. It all started at the end of December, and as low as I felt, I kept reminding myself: this too shall pass, everything is temporary, things will get better.

And they did.

Starting over is something we can do as often as needed.

This week, I closed a huge loop in my quest for peace and happiness, and I feel like a new person. A new life awaits, one filled with a deep sense of freedom.

[huge sigh]

It is now time.

Time to return to one of my favorite places to walk, to think, to just be: the Camino de Santiago. That path that has given me so much, and to which I seem almost addictedl but what a beautiful addiction it is. An addiction to nature, to peace, to solitude… or sometimes to connection. To long days of walking, to quiet thoughts, to unexpected conversations with strangers who somehow don’t feel like strangers at all.

It is invigorating—even when you are completely exhausted from the miles.

So yes, this is my first step toward starting fresh. Clean. Free.

Just thinking about it brings a huge smile to my face. I feel incredibly fortunate that I can still do this—still travel, still explore, still choose.

When I look back at the pain I experienced -pain caused by the actions of others-I realize something important: I need to keep practicing letting go of expectations.

To do things because they are right, not because I expect gratitude or recognition in return.

It’s easy to say… much harder to live with zero expectations.

But the truth is, people forget. And before anything else, we are simply human and we want gratitude, recognition or a simple thanks.

So my intention for this journey is to let go of expectations, of hopes placed on others, of the quiet wish that people will always do the right thing. Because if I don’t, my heart will carry more sadness than it needs to.

So I will keep being me… just without the expectations.

Does that sound cynical?

Maybe. But if you think about it, reaching that state is actually incredibly healthy for everyone involved, but especially for the person who chooses, with intention, to let go.

Letting go of expectations is not cynicism, it’s freedom.

We’ll see how it goes. I’ve been working on this for a while, but my tendency to see the best in people sometimes clouds my vision.

This journey will be part of that practice.

I’m also taking a long break from work to reassess my life. We shall see where I land by the end of the summer.

In the past few weeks, I’ve been feeling stronger and I’ve been intentionally creating space for things that relax me.

I built a tiny wooden garden (so therapeutic, and honestly, the result is the cutest thing). I started engraving, on everything I could find! And one day, I looked at my dining table and thought, why not?

So I started drawing. And as I drew, something familiar began to emerge… it was the Camino.

Of course it was.

So I kept going. I engraved it. My first big piece. I’ve done mugs, and even started a walking stick (still a work in progress), but this felt different.

And I have to say… not bad, Patricia, not bad.

It makes me smile, and that’s enough.

These small, creative moments have helped me stay grounded. Present. At peace.

And of course -family and friends. My kids, as always, are my constant support. We talk or text every day, rarely missing a moment to check in. And my friends… always ready to show up, to share time, to remind me I’m not alone.

What more could I ask for?

So this is my mid-month reflection.

I hope you are doing things that make you smile. That fill your heart. That bring you peace.

And most importantly, taking care of yourself.

Because in the end, only you can choose to do that.

Love, 🌷

PS: the picture above is a combination of a picture taken of me and my pup in The Camino and a bit of help from ChatGPT for the effects I loved 😉